The last few months have proven to be a huge challenge. It seems like in every area of my life there is turmoil and transition, making it feel like my foundation is crumbling and my world is being thrown about in a huge lake of waves.
And in the midst of it all there are clear moments when I KNOW that there is a reason for all of it. But so often I forget that. Even after all of the lessons from losing Mark and having to re-build my whole world. I still forget.
What is it about being human that makes us forget the lessons we learn? Is it that life just throws us obstacles constantly for no reason? Or is it maybe that life itself is trying to teach us how to remember? Maybe it’s that until we remember on a normal basis life will keep shaking us up.
When I step out of the daily details and craziness I know that somewhere down the line I will understand everything that is happening. I have faith that each thing that seems so crazy and insurmountable will be resolved, either by me or just by life itself moving forward. And in this there is comfort.
So, while my emotions and my feelings and my actions, thoughts and words may seem jumbled and unclear, I do know this; there is a reason for it all. And in this knowing there is space, breathing, relaxation, peace and joy. There is a way to slow down, take each moment in, work through the trials and tribulations of this lifetime and smile.
If I learned anything from losing Mark I learned to be more gentle with myself, to trust that what is happening is supposed to be happening, and to move forward with a small amount of grace.
If I could only remember it more often. 🙂
I hope your day is full of remembering.